Storms To Weather

Knife in the back,

Life is off track

Everything is out of place.

 

Feet off the ground

I’m flailing around,

Falling flat on my face.

 

There’re many storms to weather,

trying to get my life together

but some things left no trace.

 

Decisions to be made

and debts to be paid,

No special treatment in this case.

 

I am on my own, lost on all alone,

lost on all alone,

I’m  last place in this race.

 

It’ll take hard work and time,

It won’t be an easy climb,

But everything will fall in place.

 

After the Shower

There’s a moment,

after turning off the hot water,

that I notice my surroundings

when it’s just me,

naked and alone.

There’s a moment

that I’m in a state of confusion,

unsure of where I am

when it’s just me,

naked and alone.

There’s  a moment,

where I question everything,

where I feel everything,

when it’s just me,

naked and alone.

There’s a moment

that I try to commit

do I open a door and

feel a rush of new things,

when it’s just me,

naked and alone?

There’s a moment

when I touch the handle,

and I contemplate everything

when it’s just me,

naked and alone.

There’s a moment

when I decide to move forward,

and brace myself for the change

when it’s just me,

naked and alone.

There’s a moment

when I start to realize

even after the shower,

when it’s just me,

naked and alone.

In that moment,

I know nothing changed.

I’m just as vulnerable as before

because it’s just me,

naked and alone.

Sorry

Sorry I haven’t posted much this semester. I’ve been really busy student teaching. Being with kids makes me happy, so I haven’t really had many strong emotions to write poetry about lately. However, darkness is stirring in my life so I’ll probably get to posting again after I finish writing the 4 papers I have due next week. Be on the look out

Alone for the Holiday

Alone, yet again

for another holiday.

Me myself and I

will be present Christmas day.

No one to snuggle

and kiss under mistletoe.

No one to bring home

There’s no one to want to go.

Alone, yet again

No reason for me to brag.

To Christmas dinner

My parents will have to drag.

I love Christmas time,

but it gets harder each year.

No one to love me,

Kills all of my Christmas cheer.

 

No One Loves Me


No one loves me,

And I honestly think no one ever will.

I can’t keep telling myself this,

But I can’t stop either.

I can’t tell myself that it will be okay, that

That tomorrow will be different

When tomorrow never is.

I can’t pretend someone loves me

Because it only hurts more

When reality sets in

And I have to face the truth.

No one loves me,

And I can’t change that.

I can’t ask someone to love me

When I know the answer already.

Why set myself up for failure.

If someone loves me,

They would have told me by now,

And I wouldn’t have to spend

Another night alone,

Crying into my pillow

Hoping my heart will stop

So that the tears finally end.

Pizza For Breakfast

Doing things differently

Every once in a while

Is good for the mind,

Good for the soul.

Just tell me why

I shouldn’t eat pizza

For breakfast today

If it’s in my fridge.

I don’t always have

to eat a plain bagel.

And why shouldn’t I

Wear neon pink lipstick

On a dreary Monday?

Is there anything

that says maybe  I shouldn’t

rearrange my room

To keep things exciting?

Little changes keep me alive.

They keep me motivated

To get up every day

And expect today to be

Different from yesterday.

I need to know that

The future is brighter

even if that means

consuming cold pizza for breakfast.

for breakfast today.