One-Way Street

I’m tired of being alone,

but I’m also tired of trying.

Why am I the only one?

Why is this a one-way street?

It feels like when I reach out,

people step away from me.

Friends make excuses,

dates cancel plans,

and family tells me to go away.

I’m never enough,

no matter my intentions.

Why aren’t I good enough?

What do I have to do

to get some love around here?

SHouldn’t everyone be loved?

Why am I the exception?

When Did We Grow Up?

When did we grow up?

When did childhood dreams

become our reality?

It feels like just yesterday

we were kids just talking

about what we wanted to do

with the rest of our lives

and now we’re adults.

We have real jobs.

We have to pay bills.

We have actual responsibilities.

Where did time go?

When did we grow up?

 

 

Overthinking

I can’t sleep at night.

It’s tearing me apart.

I can’t stop thinking.

I am overthinking

every little thing.

Things I should just forget,

unimportant things,

suddenly consume me.

I’m anxious about

every aspect of life-

school, love life, work, home.

Constantly running but

I just can’t keep up.

Physically I’m behind,

but mentally I’m

so far ahead that I

see it’s all pointless.

They Don’t See

When people look at me, they just see my stretch marks.

They don’t see the 5 lives I’ve saved.

They don’t see me giving back to the community.

They don’t see me teaching young children to read.

 

When people look at me, all they see is my weight.

They don’t see my athletic career.

They don’t see my honors diploma.

They don’t see my kindness.

 

When people look at me, they just see my obesity.

They don’t see me volunteering with dogs.

They don’t see me working 3 jobs.

They don’t see who I really am

And that’s a true shame.

 

Obvious

It’s hard to act like

I have my life together

I obviously don’t.

 

It’s hard to act like

I’m organized and on top of things.

I’m obviously not.

 

It’s hard to act like

My workload isn’t stressing me out.

It obviously is.

 

It’s hard to act like

I’m conquering life.

I’m obviously not.

 

It’s hard to act like

the simplest things don’t cause a breakdown.

They obviously do.

 

It’s hard to act like

things are going to get better.

It’s not so obvious.