Suffocating

I feel like I’m suffocating.

I go through the motions every day

to live the life that is expected up me

but more often than not

I feel like I’m trapped in a life

that belongs to someone else.

I feel as though I am not my own person.

I am just the person everyone else

wants me to be. And I hate it.

I hate who I am, how I look.

I hate my backstory.

I have more regrets than I

could shake all the sticks in the world at.

I can’t change the things about me

to even try to live the life I want

so I keep on living the one I’ve got.

But why?

It’s pointless.

I’m not going anywhere.

Why bother even trying anymore?

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Who Even am I?

Who even am I?

Am I really a teacher?

Am I really a swimmer?

Am I really a lifeguard?

 

Who even am I?

Am I really a band kid?

Am I really a good student?

Am I really a sorority girl?

 

Who even am I?

Am I just living lies?

Am I able to make my own choices?

Am I just another pawn?

 

I don’t know how to be the person

that I decide to be

because everyone chose for me.

Who even am I?