The Girl You Knew

The Girl You Knew was shattered;

in rambles; in shreds.

She needed to put herself back

into one piece again.

 

The Girl You Knew  needed help

figuring out who she was now

that everything she used to be

was gone; you took advantage.

 

The Girl You Knew was vulnerable

and let you use her how you needed,

while she broke into tiny pieces

and lost further sight of herself.

 

The Girl You Knew cared about you

and was hurt when you left.

You found ways to hurt a girl

who was already hurting deep.

 

That’s not the girl you know now.

 

The Girl You Know Now is Confident.

She’s put her life back together

and come out stronger with a life

she is proud to live by herself.

 

The Girl You Know Now is motivated.

She did what she had to do

to be a better person

and live her best life.

 

The Girl You Know Now is fierce.

She is a born leader

who helps shape the future

and the world to make it better.

 

The Girl You Know Now is caring

She is loved. She is happy.

And most important of all

she doesn’t need you.

 

 

What I Needed

I needed you

on that cold January day

when I met to get my fix.

 

I needed you

when you denied me

and left me in the dirt.

 

I needed you

as my eyes froze

shut with tears.

 

I needed you

as my hand clutched

the pill bottle in my pocket.

 

I needed you

to keep me from myself

ending my life.

 

I needed you

and you left me there

to pick my own self up.

 

I needed you

but I don’t now,

That was 7 long years ago.

 

I don’t need you anymore.

 

Commitment

I want commitment.

I’m not here to play games.

I want to make a plan,

make a future for myself.

If you want a part of it,

then do something.

I’ll gladly make additions.

That part is easy.

it removing someone

over and over that’s hard.

That’s not reliable.

I need people to count on,

a sturdy foundation.

I need commitment.

You’re either in or out.

Which is it?

 

No Longer a Victim

Today is the last day that your name will ever cross my lips.

Your name does not deserve to be uttered by me.

You took something priceless from me that I cannot ever get back.

Six years ago you soiled me and made me feel worthless.

I’ve never mentioned your name to another living soul

because no one else should ever have to hear about you

or the awful things you’ve done to me.

But I just don’t have the time or energy left to carry this burden anymore.

It’s not even a burden I should have to carry.

Why should I be the one who feels guilty when I did nothing wrong?

I’m tired of making poor decisions for my life

just to cover up the pathetic one you made six years ago.

I want to move on with my life and never think about you again.

I deserve to be happy and find peace with myself.

I cannot change the past, but I can choose my future

and I want you to have absolutly zero part of it.

So today I’ll share your name just once,

not here because it’s more attention than you’ll ever deserve.

But I will be taking this burden off of my shoulders

and leave it in the mountains so I never see it again.

I’ll return home with a clean slate, no longer a victim.

It’s time to fight for what I actually deserve in life.