Spent

I say I want to make a difference,

but all I really am is “different”.

I seem ambitious; optimistic,

but my energy and time is spent.

Go Out Walking

Every day I  go out walking

miles and miles of trails that wind

hoping, and praying,

to leave myself behind.

I’m looking for a new me,

one I can face in the mirror

because now all I can see

is someone far inferior.

Sometimes I think it’s working;

that all the struggles are worth it.

I  do everything correctly,

but nothing has changed a bit.

No matter how hard I work,

no matter how hard I strive

I’m greeted by the same person

at the end when I arrive.

Settling for Less

Dating anyone but you

would mean I’m settling.

How do I convince myself

that I’m actually worth less?

How do I tell myself

that I don’t deserve

everything I thought that I

could ever want in life?

How do I tell myself that

I can be happy with

someone who has less to offer?

How do I   live with myself?

How do I keep going

when I know what’s waiting

for me down the road

is just disappointment?

No one can ever compare.

You’re the gold medal.

Everyone else just feels like

a participation trophy.