I say I want to make a difference,
but all I really am is “different”.
I seem ambitious; optimistic,
but my energy and time is spent.
Sometimes writing poems let's me forget about the huge sums of debt I'm accumulating while at college
I say I want to make a difference,
but all I really am is “different”.
I seem ambitious; optimistic,
but my energy and time is spent.
Every day I go out walking
miles and miles of trails that wind
hoping, and praying,
to leave myself behind.
I’m looking for a new me,
one I can face in the mirror
because now all I can see
is someone far inferior.
Sometimes I think it’s working;
that all the struggles are worth it.
I do everything correctly,
but nothing has changed a bit.
No matter how hard I work,
no matter how hard I strive
I’m greeted by the same person
at the end when I arrive.
All I ever am
is a huge disappointment.
Can’t do one thing right.
Dating anyone but you
would mean I’m settling.
How do I convince myself
that I’m actually worth less?
How do I tell myself
that I don’t deserve
everything I thought that I
could ever want in life?
How do I tell myself that
I can be happy with
someone who has less to offer?
How do I live with myself?
How do I keep going
when I know what’s waiting
for me down the road
is just disappointment?
No one can ever compare.
You’re the gold medal.
Everyone else just feels like
a participation trophy.
When I talk to you,
I can’t look you in the eye.
‘Cause I’m ashamed.
I am ashamed
Of the little that I am
In comparison.
When compared to you,
I know that I am worthless.
You deserve better