I’m Desperate

I’m desperate to please.

I’m desperate to love.

The latter I’ve got plenty of.

I’m desperate to feel.

I’m desperate to fall.

But honestly it will never happen at all.

I’m desperate…

I’m desperate…

I’m holding out for anything I can get.

I’m desperate,

I’m desperate!

But I’m still not good enough yet….

My Bitmoji

My bitmoji is prettier than me.

Even though I am the one who made it,

it looks nothing like me.

Forever tan, perfect makeup,

bright smiling face

always around to add flair

to a conversation.

I made her as fat as I could

and still she looks nothing like me.

I feel like a catfish, a liar

every time I use her face.

My bitmoji is prettier than me

and I can’t believe that makes me jealous.

Begging for Scraps

When it comes to love,

I feel like a dog that is

sitting next to the table,

begging for scraps of

whatever I can get.

I feel like I should

just be grateful that I

get to lick the plate

because honestly?

I’m lucky that there’s

even anything left for me.

It’s probably more than I deserve.

My Bluff

I

loved

you

Okay, Call me on my bluff.

I

love

you

but it will never be enough

Shattered Dreams

I was such a fool

to let you convince me

I deserved to dream.

So.

I.

Did.

And look at where it got me.

Alone.

Broke.

Depressed.

Just to name a few

I guess I should have known better

than to get mixed up with you,

Eggs

I thought I knew what love was.

turns out that was a lie.

Put all my eggs in one basket

and you cracked them all in one try.

GPS

I was driving down the road

I thought led to my future,

when my Gps told me to

make unexpected turn.

I kept going forward

thinkIng I knew so much better

what was best for me.

The GPS kept saying

“turn around when possible”

but I just shrugged it off.

I was blind to other options;

he was the only one for me.

But now my road has reached a dead end

and I’m all out of gas.

I guess I should have listened

because now I have no destination.

Grief

I mourn for all the things

that could have someday been,

but I grieve harder for all the things

that can never be the same again.

An Unexpected Blow

Your words were an unexpected blow to my chest

and I’ve been struggling to breathe ever since.

Sand Castle

My love was a sand castle

that I spent time meticulously crafting

and getting every window, every flag

just right before I would show you

the creation I made for you in it’s entirety.

I have never been more proud of anything

I have ever done or accomplished before now.

This castle was my life’s masterpiece.

And you stepped right in the middle of it,

purposeful destruction everywhere.

And the worst part was you never looked back

as my walls crumbled to the ground.